Grieve appropriately. Oh, I have the grieve part down. I could have certainly filled up my own 50 gallon salt water fish tank with the amount of tears I've cried since June.
The appropriate part, I might've missed. But, I have repented of my misplaced hope and lack of trust in God's timing and sovereignty.
I felt like God was impressing on me to respond by giving up Mason and all the while reflecting His glory.
However, I had not rightly understood the calling. All I dwelt on was that God was asking me to give up Mason. And I couldn't process that kind of pain. I couldn't shake my hurt, so I wasn't able to glorify God rightly. Then I got it. I was looking at the request so negatively, I was to busy mourning my loss to realize what was really happening. God was asking me to GAIN HIM.
It's not about what I'm losing... it's about everything I have to gain in Christ. He's not asking me to lay down something good, without offering something better: Him. He has to be enough. He has to be my desire. My satisfaction is found in He and He alone. If I can grab a hold of this truth, believe it and live it out, I will have gained the greatest treasure.
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